I just watched Steel Magnolias for the first time. After crying my face off, I got to thinking about how very fortunate I am to have my very own Sally Fields. You see, when it comes to mothers – I have the best. Hands down.
Mom and I have always been close. Always. She’s one of those people you just WANT to be around because what makes my mom so special is the amount of goodness in her heart. She always says “even if it isn’t easy – always do the right thing.” And she does. She really, truly does.
My mother never gossips. Not once. Never. She thinks everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt. Don’t get that confused with weakness though. She won’t talk about others, but if you say even the slightest disparaging word against someone she loves…. well the phrase hell hath no fury comes to mind. My mom is fearless and no one will intimidate her if she is defending her family.
My mom is my moral compass. Literally – my decisions are made based upon her voice in my head telling me if something is a good idea or not. Because she is always right. Always. She always does the right thing. How many people are there in the world that can say they do that?
My mom is not fancy. She doesn’t buy a lot of things for herself. Instead, she always gets things for others. Stuff here and there. Dad and I joke that she makes us feel guilty when we buy things because while we are picking out some shoes or a gadget, she’s buying gifts for others. That’s just my mom. She is happier giving.
When I had Gavin last year, my mom was there in the room the entire time. I had a lot of difficulty and went into panic shocks/anxiety attacks a few time and my mom whispered things in my ear that I can’t remember now but apparently were the only way I would snap out of it. She was there when they decided to do the emergency C section. She was there in the recovery room when I wouldn’t snap out of my twilight stage. She was there when I finally did. She went home at 3am that night (two hours away) and was back up the next morning by 10am. She had a lot of other things going on that day, but never spoke of them. Her focus was me. She stayed with me for a week when I came home and made me lunch everyday and dinner every night. She stayed awake until 4am the first night home rocking Gavin because I was sick. The day she went home I cried harder than I have ever cried in my entire life.
We have a phrase we say to each other: “I love you once. I love you twice…” and the other finishes “I love you more than beans and rice.” The day before I got married, I gave her a little silver necklace with one little silver bean on it. She wears it every single day.
If I can be half the mom – or heck, half the human being – my mom is, I will consider myself a success. The world would be such a better place if there were more people like her. Because she is the best.
I will teach my son her patience and her guidance. I will teach him to ALWAYS stand up to bullies even if you aren’t the one who is the victim. I will teach him to never settle and always strive to be better because better is always possible. I will teach him to love God. I will teach him that happiness and love is all you need. I will teach him to do the right thing, no matter how difficult it may be. I will teach him to be uniquely and fearlessly him.
Because that’s what my mom taught me.